fyi, im Back to my xanga.com...

im totally lost!!!

The eyes are the mouth of soul??!!!

I know its a bit funny with this photo~!! But it means alot for me~~!!

Honey says," your mouth says you love me but your eyes telling different story!" hahaha!!!

Loveless

Honey's next purchase 4 me.. Loveless necklace~~!! Never ever look down on this plain pendant as it actually has a story behind (if you're Final Fantasy's fans)... Moreover, the price of this necklace isnt cheap at all... anyway, thanks bump bump~~!!

Just look down on me!

i know many of us tend to judge others by outers and sometimes determine their piety by their outfits. For me, it is pretty common when ppl try to criticize or make a sweet compliment about you. Nah, thats rare! However i dont really mind whatever ppl try to "huha" about me, but it just feel sucked when he/she is someone you love and care the most! Its a real big slap on face and hurts still. Just curious that how you guys feel when you fall into same situation as me? What will you do??!! For me, i do feel dissapointed and helpless but it doesnt stop me here yet it strengthen me~~!!

From now on, im going to keep my eyes wide open, focus ahead and never look down and backwards! I've read one interesting book which the author says " we have little choice but to cross the chasm, knowing that the trip across the wire will be scary. But if you keep your head up and look forward, in the end the greatness will be yours!!! its just extremely powerful~~!!

Just let me moving forward and believe soon GREATNESS will be end of the walk!

thanks mum!!!

Leaving home and study abroad for the first time inevitably brings about emotions one would never expect to occur. I thought further up my studies in oversea would be great as it is one of my biggest dream in lifetime and im glad that my wish come true. I would finally gain the independence I so longed for and felt I deserved. To me, living abroad meant I could live on my own two feet and be the independent woman I've been dreaming to be ever since I was a little girl. Its good when no one cares and i will never hear any earful sounds. haha!!

It also meant no more being told to "Do homework and stop watching tv!" or "Clear up the table!" by my mom. I wouldn't have to do everything she wanted me to do at the drop of a hat. Quickly, I realized I miss the fact that my mom always found a way to tell me what to do and dont. Being so far away from home left me as the sole person to make decisions.

It was up to me to call the shots and decide which path I wanted to take on the highway of life. I could no longer expect my mom to always help guide me through life's toughest decisions and hold my hand each bumpy step of the way.I do wish this somehow. The first time I hit a rough patch at school, I didn't know what to do. All I could think of was, "Is it okay that I ask my mom what to do? I thought Im the one in charge now." I wasn't sure if running to my mom every time I was hurt or upset would help me gain the independence I've always wanted.Through the tears and worries, I soon discovered that it is okay to rely on my mom for help.

I realized that, despite the distance, my mom was still always going to "be there" for me, though maybe not as much as I needed her to be at the time. She was and still is ready to lend a helping hand when I just don't know what to do. There isn't a mean bone in my mom's body. She has always been a helper, the one everyone turns to for advice.It's kind of ironic, but study abroad has actually brought my mom and me a lot closer. She is the first person I call when I'm upset or down. I also know that she confides in me many of the things that are bothering her. I know she is only a phone call away all of the time, ready to drop everything she is doing and ready to help me through my problems.

People always say once you go and study in uni,your life will never be the same. To some extent, I believe that to be true. Of course, life will never be the same. I won't be home permanently ever again and I cant act like a kid either. However, the relationship my mom and i will never change and nothing gonna fade our love away. She will always be the same caring, loving, helping friend to me that she has always been. There will never again be a day when I have to question whether calling my mom when I'm upset is the right thing to do or not .Growing closer to her this past year has made me appreciate how much she has done for me, how much she does for me now, and how much she will do for me in the future. I truly thank my mom for everything she has done for me. She has helped shape me into the person I am today. Without her in my life, I don't know where I would be. She truly is my role model. I only hope that one day I can fill her shoes and return the favor by being the helping hand and listening ear to my own children. BILLION THANKS MUM!!!

and...

I Y HONEYCHIAM ...

From this day, till next day and to the other day or forever.

Due to all these depression, I've got approval from mum to go back in april. So now, lets get me focus on studies and finish all my assignment before i enjoy my upcoming short holiday in Malaysia...yeahooo!!!

Sexy Sexy

took this in toilet...*wink*

Study is just UNSEXY at all...!

everybody, lets say r to BOOKS.. Yeah!!!

Yours silly filly,

YLeeLingDiongY

I feel so uncomfortable with myself these days. Is that because of stress? or something else?

Probably homesick gets me nowhere at the moment. I hate myself when i started to think of going back home and it gets in the way of my studies. Plenty of assignments and exams have stressed me OUT!! A great force of it makes me crying my eyes out..! **SOB SOB**

Anyway, i've found one of my long lost friends, Jie Wen. Lost contact with her after she moved to ipoh. Im glad to hear from her again and got to know she's doing her degree in UPM. Alright, thats all for today. Btw, how can i manage my stress? probably stress management book will do...!!

Yours truly,

LeeLingDiong~!

$#%$#%#^%^#$

People are easily get sick when the weather changed from hot to cold and cold to hot. Just like now, the temperature has gone down alot since few days ago and im feeling not well. Mr ABC (running nose, coughing and sore throat) is visiting me and therefore, I never got a good sleep. that's pretty shit.

yesterday, i was planning to go and see a doctor since i've already paid for my OverSea Healthcare Fee. We can just visit particular clinics only , or else we hv to pay for consultation fees, medicine and etc. So i went to the nearest one which located in curtin's campus and wanted to make an appointment. Naive of me thought that i can see the doctor at the day, but the nurse told me to come on next week. that's real fucked up! i was stunned. and i said to the nurse, "what? you're not gonna let me be this way as im sick. And i've paid so much for the fees yet i dont deserve any treatment? so, whats the point for me paying this large sum of money every year?" yeah, i was a bit harsh on her... why? do they willing to see me become "salted fish" in the house? shit man... that was my day.pretty that matter had ruined my all day. angry...stupid OSHC!!!!

Yours truly,

Lovey?Dovey?

Date:16th March 2009.
Time: 11.43pm
Location: my room

I feel sad and lonely at here.That sounds like an old David Lee Roth song. But this is how I feel. I am just so sad. I just want to sit and cry. I want to go back desperately!

I cant believe how time flies since classes have started in uni. one of the things thats been stressing me out and turning me into blue mode is how mAny assignments, and how little i've done. in addition, its been a long time since i went to the city to do a proper shopping. therefore, i went to the city this afternoon and I've found plenty of stuff in low prices. hehe!! Sigh, this time i could see myself over budget again and most probably mum will yell at me when she look at my bills... there you go.. first time i shopped in Gucci shop and came out with a bag and a purse.. nice? Im in love with this bag when i saw it at the display in the shop..

See.. Now i can added another two branded things that i have so far...

Below are just a part of my branded bags that i brought to Aus, i still have a few in my house... hehehe!! im heart into branded things.. miawwwWWW... ( see my Lv's collection...) loving them so much...

ALright, thats all for this weekend...ppl enjoy your weekend... muaxx..

Today's weather is good... gloomy day..I like it...See the field filled up by ppl...

*Picnic time*

OMFG

Last night I've had found this... the ugliest photo of me and probably the most disgusting one in my lifetime. Sigh... better don't laugh when you look at it..

For your info, i will be officially using this website from now on... :)

Hush Hush from PussyCat Dolls

A real nice song that needs to be LISTEN... Check it UP...!!!

Oooooh ooooh

I never needed you to be strong

I never needed you for pointin' out my wrongs

I never needed pain,i never needed strain.

My love for you was strong enough you should've known.

I never needed you for judgement

I never needed you to question what i spent

I never asked for help,

I take care of myself,

I don't know why you think you got a hold on me.

And it's a little in the conversations

There isn't anything that you can say.

And my eyes hurt, hands shiver, so look at me and listen to me because,

I don't want to

Stay another minute

I don't want you

To say a single word

Hush Hush, Hush Hush

There is no other way I get the final say

BecauseI don't want to

Do this any longerI don't want you

There's nothing left to say Hush Hush, Hush Hush

I've already spoken Our love is brokenBaby Hush Hush

I never needed your corrections

On everything from how i act to what i sayi never needed words,

i never needed hurt, i never needed you to be there everyday

I'm sorry for the way i let goOf everything i wanted when you came along

But i am never beaten, broken, not defeated

I know next to you is not where i belong

And it's a little late for explanations

There isn't anything that you can do

And my eyes hurt, hands shiver, so you will listen when i say baby

I don't want toStay another minute

I don't want you

To say a single wordHush Hush, Hush Hush

There is no other way I get the final say

BecauseI don't want toDo this any longer

I don't want you

There's nothing left to say Hush Hush, Hush Hush

I've already spoken

Our love is broken Baby Hush Hush

No more words

No more lies

No more crying ooh ooh

No more pain

No more hurt

No more tryin'

Oh Oh Yeah

BecauseI don't want toStay another minute

I don't want you

To say a single wordHush Hush, Hush Hush

There is no other way I get the final say

BecauseI don't want to

Do this any longer

I don't want you

There's nothing left to say Hush Hush, Hush Hush

I've already spoken

Our love is broken

Baby Hush HushYeah OhHush Hush, Hush Hush

I've already spoken

Our love is broken

Baby

Yes I am depressed...!!!

My BF and I always argued these days. I dont know what is going on with us. I find it hard to breathe in this relationship. Everything seems stucked... Why he always think guy shouldnt be the one wearing pant in the relationship?

I hate his egoism...!!!!

Could someone giving me some advise of this state of affair?

Im HELPLESS at this very moment. Honestly, I know we cant get any longer perhaps, at this few months we will break up. This sort of thing doesnt need a genuis to figure out. I know where is the problem has emerged, but there's just too much things I will have to consider before make it an end of us.

Im worry I cant handle everything in this alienated place.

I dont really hv any close friend

and thousand of anxiousness Im having now..

No matter how it will be... I just hope I'll be STRONG...

Maybe I look weak physically yet I have a STRONG SPIRIT which no one could see it...

Thing that I usually do when I am too FREEEEEEEE, scrolling down and hv a look...

Jeng Jeng... Ladies and Gentlemen...

Here We go...

Could i wearing this for my BIGGY DAY? oops, I mean my wedding lah! Im dying for for this gown seriously...:P

I think this rainbow long dress is designed by Valentino... Not bad... and i think only certain ppl can wear it due to the skin features and height. OF course body shape as well...

Baby Pink Long dress... Damn nice right? I love this dress the most....


Nice RIGHT? For me, GOOD things need to be share with everybody....!!!

Muax...

Humph, since after first week of January, I don't see myself got anything to key in in my blog. Being lazy all the time maybe due to weather???

Too hot and it drains my energy. What do you reckon? For me, its hard to concentrate on studies during summer. Plus, I don't hv aircond in my room here, frigging hot...!! arghHh...!

So many things have to sort out before my class starts in Feb. That's the reason why I had to come back so early... Kinda pathetic this year, 2009 for me, I will hv to celebrate CNY without family members in Perth. I'm not sure what would i feel on that day... Crying maybe... sobbing...

But I hope I'll be STRONG

I've received a call from Gary last night... He told me that he will be going to hongkong with his gf soon. I hv no idea why he did that to me. Purposely called and told me this.. Apparently he said he just wanted to share his excitement with me... Bull crap.But its alright... Im gonna call you and tell you that I'll be going to London in June with Mark. In addition, just in case you might forget, I'll sms you once I tell you so.. Ha ha!! Anyhow, enjoy your trip and buy my mickey glove OK?

Miss you guys in M'sia...

Hope to see you SOON!!!!

Last night since i've nothing to do, so I ended up by curling my hair... Nice or not? Seriously, I think straight hair suits me more, at least i dont look like a aunty. :P

New Blog New Life

After all I have found out blogspot.com is better than other blog's websites... I think blogspot.com is much more more interesting and user-friendly , because I used to hv an account in xanga before its kinda hard to use. Dont know.. hard to find nice heading as if compared with blogspot 1. nah, i dont mean to promote how good blogspot.com is or being bribe to say something good on it , im just telling the truth based on my own opinion.